How to be Friends with Someone Who isn't Really Friends with Anyone
by DigitalLuv
Summary: Shadow The Hedgehog meets one of Rouge's friends. She's afraid that Shadow doesn't socialize enough. Shadow X FC


Chapter 1:

Shadow tsked in irritation as he walked down the sidewalk. Rouge had introduced Shadow to this female hedgehog the other day. Apparently, they were friends. He did not think Rouge actually cared to keep extracurricular friends around. While he would classify his relationship with Rouge and OMEGA as friendship, they had forged their bonds through hardship and adventure rather than mundane social interaction with the normal populous. It seemed much more meaningful than what could ever be attained in a "normal" environment.

However, Rouge thought it would be in his best interest to widen his social circle, even if just a little. That was why she was making a large effort to introduce him to all these annoying people. She had been introducing him mostly to some of her coworker friends. This new one however was a friend she had met outside of work. He had only been tolerating it because deep down he knew Rouge only pursued this because she cared. He had no interest in meeting her little friends. She had mostly been introducing Shadow to females. He was unsure if it is because that is just what she had available to her or if she thought Shadow would be more comfortable around women. Shadow tapped his lip. He did have a history of forming strong bonds with women rather than men, maybe because women were inherently less aggressive? Shadow huffed and turned his head to the short female hedgehog making an effort to walk beside him.

He briefly wondered if Rouge was paying this annoying woman to socialize with him.

A few days after Rouge had introduced Shadow to this "Sita" female, he had been walking down the street coming home from work when she saw him and quickly crossed the street to happily greet him. She followed him a little ways asking questions and talking incessantly. Shadow had been annoyed. At first, he attempted to ignore the female, but realizing that she was not going away he attempted to gruffly answer her questions to make her leave faster. Only to have it bite him in the ass. She had asked if Shadow walked that way from work every day, to which Shadow replied with a gruff yes. To his dismay it had turned out that was the way she walked to her kid's school every day at the same time.

He gritted his teeth in irritation remembering the incident. The woman had been tailing, waiting and following him every day for a week now, with no signs of letting up. At least he would not have to see her face on the weekend. In addition, every time they had to part she would wave good-bye and run around the corner to where the school was. Bringing a wave of relief over Shadow. He could not tell her not to walk there, he did not own the street, but he was beginning to dread coming through this way. He did not want to upset the woman because he knew she would tell Rouge on him and then Rouge would be angry with him. He did not want that. So instead, he tolerated her existence. The walk was also nice enough where he did not want to take a different route and he had to admit that the time they spent walking together was not too terribly long, so he could live with it. He enjoyed walking the direction he did and did not want to run through it. Besides all she would do was talk, he could ignore her the best he could.

He rolled his eyes, she had to practically trot to keep up with him. She had not realized that he had not been paying attention to her dribbling prattle. He looked around and he noticed that he had walked in the direction of the dumb woman's kid's school. He felt a growl emanate from his throat, while he was not paying attention to the woman he forgot where he was going and just followed her.

"Don't you usually go that way?" She said pointing backwards and still walking.

"I'm taking a detour today." Shadow said turning away indignantly. Sita raised an eyeridge in curiosity, but shook it off.

"Well that's alright. You can walk with me to the school and meet my kid." She said leading him across the street. Shadow could not help but roll his eyes, if the kid was as annoying as she was he decided he would definitely find a new route to work. She hoped she would not force him to meet with the child daily as well. Shadow looked across the street and saw the school. Tons of children were waiting outside for their parents. One a Porcupine perked up seeing Sita and ran over. Shadow furrowed his brow, she seemed a little old to be the hedgehog's child, not to mention the obvious species difference.

"She doesn't look very much like you." Shadow said inspecting the two carefully looking for any similarities.

"Oh, well…." Sita said biting her lip before answering, "She's not really mine. I adopted her."

Shadow was now doubly confused; she seemed much too young to be approved for adoption, "How old are you?" He said turning genuinely curious.

"I just turned 19 a few months ago." Sita said. Shadow hummed in thought. Yes, she was much too young to be considered as a suitable adopted parent. "Wait here one second." She said running up to the child and picking her up. Audibly and loudly hugging and loving on the child. Shadow found it annoying. She promptly brought the child back to him and swiftly introduced him.

"This is Perfume!" She said lovingly shaking the child's shoulder. Shadow raised an eyeridge looking down at the little thing. How old was this kid? She looked like she was 5.

Perfume whom was at first smiling then frowned at Shadow and looked down before indignantly greeting him. Shadow looked at Sita confused; Sita shrugged and then patted the Porcupine's head. "Did you have a hard day at school?" Perfume nodded before stealing a glance at Shadow.

Shadow had to briefly wonder if she was afraid of him. Perhaps that would be a positive development so that the female would not want to walk with him anymore.

"Well. How about we get some ice cream? That always makes you feel better." She said standing up again and turning to Shadow "Would you like to come with us?"

Shadow shook his head "I do not eat ice cream, besides I need to…" however, Shadow was swiftly cut off.

"What do you mean you do not eat ice cream?" Sita said laughing incredulously, "Everyone eats ice cream dude, you should come up with a better excuse than that."

Shadow furrowed his brow, "No I really do not. I only eat life sustaining substances." It was more complicated than that, but he would keep the explanation light.

"Psh, like what?" Sita questioned.

"Rice and beans." Shadow said flatly

"And…" Sita said attempting to prompt the hedgehog

"Water."

"And what else?"

"There is nothing else. That's all I eat."

"That can't be everything you eat." Sita said becoming more serious

"I only eat what will minimally supply my caloric intake and I do not try or eat anything else."

"You do not try anything else? Have you tried Ice cream?"

"No of course not, that would require eating your stomach rotting food." Shadow said snobbily. Sita stood there looking dumbfounded at the hedgehog before turning to Perfume making a face. Perfume looked at Shadow before looking back at Sita and slowly nodding.

"Well then." Sita said smirking, "How about we go try some. My treat."

Shadow sneered at the thought and folded his arm irritatedly, "I do not think so. I do not need to try it. I know where it comes from and I do not want to try it."

It was Sita's turn to be annoyed. She snorted stubbornly, before mumbling, "Rouge was right, you do act like an old man sometimes."

"What was that?" Shadow warned, he had not quite heard her.

"I said..." Sita said over pronunciating with irritation, "That we're not giving you a choice. You have to try ice cream dude. You'll love it." She cautiously walked over to him and gently tugged on his arm, "So let's go." She said stubbornly.

Shadow folded his arms over his chest and stood fast. If this woman wanted to get him to go anywhere, she would have to drag him. Inwardly Shadow smirked to himself. Considering her small stature and his weight, she would not be able to do anything.

Perfume piped up, "Let's push him to the ice cream shop!" She said running up behind Shadow and inspecting him, "He shouldn't be that fat." Shadow's quills bristled at the child's comment. He was not going to be **that** heavy.

Sita quickly jogged behind him and delicately placed her hands on his back. She started with gentle pushing to see if he would budge, but it did not take long to realize that it would require hard work to get what she wanted. She then started roughly pushing Shadow forward and to Shadow's amazement she was actually managing to move him. Slowly, but she was still managing to move him. Inwardly Sita thanked the gods that the ice cream shop was around the corner, what a surprise that would be for Shadow!

As she pushed him, his skates made an awful screeching sound on the cement. Perfume and many other pedestrians were covering their ears to the awful noise while Shadow just cringed and folded his ears down to protect them.

However, through the screeching and the muffled sound coming through Shadow's ears he could hear the female hedgehog huffing and puffing tiredly. He smirked, closed his eyes, and leaned back into her pushing just a tad. He figured she would give up shortly. He was pretty proud of his stubbornness. Maybe even after this the female would stop accompanying him on his walks. After a few minutes, he was roughly pushed onto a glass door.

"What the…" Shadow's eyes snapped open suddenly.

Sita who was still recovering her strength and breath tiredly choked out, "Now are you going to hold up your end of the bargain and come inside freely or am I going to have to push you in there too?" As she smiled about her witty comment, she walked towards the shop door, and opened it for Perfume. Shadow was annoyed again. How could a female of such small stature muster the strength to push him around like that? Sita continued holding the door open and motioned for Shadow to join them inside.

He strolled inside, "Just because you got me here, it doesn't mean that I'm participating in your little activity." Sita rolled her eyes and followed in after him. Perfume was already telling the cashier what she wanted. Sita looked at the selection and motioned Shadow over, to which he complied.

"What am I supposed to be looking at here?" He said over viewing the flavors.

"What flavor do you want?" she said gesturing stubbornly.

"Nothing."

"Fine." She said through gritted teeth before turning to the register. "I'll have double chocolate chip on a waffle cone." She waited for the cashier to get what she asked. While the cashier was working to fulfill her wishes she looked at the case and then at Shadow again. Shadow raised an eyeridge in suspicion. He didn't like the way she was looking around like that. When the cashier returned to the register Sita then said, "Oh and get a vanilla in a bowl for the vanilla over here." She said gesturing in Shadow's direction. The cashier nodded. Shadow could feel his face turn red with irritation.

"I told you I didn't want anything." He said warningly

Sita purposely avoided his gaze, "I can get what I want with my money." Shadow gritted his teeth. This female was becoming less annoying and more infuriating with each passing second. The cashier which had fulfilled Sita's request looked nervously between the two as Sita took out her wallet.

"I mean it."

As Sita gave the cashier her money she turned to Shadow and in a complete deadpan said, "Oops I accidently gave her my money."

"STOP." Shadow barked at her.

"Whoops. What a shame, too late to take it back." The cashier nervously gave Sita her change and watched as the two were having a small stare down in the store as she held the ice cream.

"I'm not eating that."

"Why?"

"Why? WHY?" Shadow had to restrain himself, "Because you bought that without my permission with the intention of me eating it. THAT'S WHY." Sita nodded and pretended to be deep in thought about what he said.

"That's rude to waste someone else's money like that." She paused for a moment before pointing at Perfume comedically, "Think of the children."

"I don't give a damn about what you do with your money female."

"You know what it sounds like to me?" She said pausing for a moment, "It sounds like you're afraid to try it. I can think of no other reason as to why you would be so opposed to the idea of trying it." Sita was nodding to herself in satisfaction about what she had just said. "Yeah, that must be it." She hummed in agreement with her own thoughts.

"Don't be ludicrous." Shadow said insulted.

"Well you're not trying it, so that makes me think it's true. And you're clearly not willing to prove otherwise." She said beginning to walk towards the table. "That's okay. I wouldn't make you do anything you would not want to do."

"Your attempt at manipulation is pathetic and futile." Shadow said following angrily and accusingly pointing a finger at her as she walked.

"Whatever..." She said aloud before mumbling just loud enough for Shadow to hear, "You Ultimate cry baby." She said as she placed the dishes on the table and purposely turned away from him to eat.

Shadow knew what she was doing, but he wanted to prove her wrong at the same time. He angrily stomped up to the table.

"Can I help you?" Sita inquired. Perfume was giggling while eating.

"Give it to me." Shadow said impatiently sitting down.

Sita tilted her head back and forth pretending to think about it before giving into the demand, "Certainly." She shoved the ice cream and a spoon towards him. She had the suppress the devilish grin that wanted to plaster her face. She knew his ego would win over his good logic.

Shadow eyed the ice cream suspiciously before looking at Sita suspiciously. Sita rolled her eyes before saying, "Ugh it's fine, just eat it."

Sita purposefully angled her head away so Shadow would feel more comfortable trying the food. Shadow delicately spooned some and smelled it. On the Ark, most of the staff ate very bland meals and vitamins. There were not specialty foods aboard the ark, although sometimes Gerald would order specialty items for Maria. So Shadow had tried chocolate a few times, but for the majority of his time on the Ark Shadow and the crew were fed bland vitamin and mineral rich meals that were healthy. There was no room for special things like this. They took up space that could belong to lab equipment.

While he was on Earth, he had the opportunity to eat with more variety, but found it easier and quicker to eat the way they did on the Ark. Not to mention that he did not have a skill for cooking, and eating out meant he would have to talk to people.

Shadow gently dabbed a little bit of it onto his tongue. It was sweet like chocolate in sugar content, but it was not chocolate. Sita had gotten him Vanilla. Therefore, this is what Vanilla tasted like apparently. He hated to admit it, but the taste was extremely pleasant. He looked at Perfume who was giggling at him. He took a few more cautious bites, as he ate he saw Sita looking over curiously.

Shadow mumbled, "It's adequate I suppose." Before, taking a larger more embarrassed bite to get the treat over with, though he was secretly and thoroughly enjoying it.

Sita smirked satisfied, "Well I'm glad you approve your majesty." She said snarkily, "You can come and eat here with us anytime." The last part she said while winking. She looked at her watch for a moment, "Though we'll have to get going soon, I have things to do at home. Hurry up and finish your ice cream Perfume so we can get you home and…" Sita was sharply cut off with Shadow holding his temples in agony.

He barked at her "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME. You poisoned me. GAH."

Sita rolled her eyes, "I didn't poison you, you dork. Press your tongue to the roof of your mouth." Shadow did as instructed and the pain went away.

Perfume commented, "You were eating too fast, you got a brain freeze."

"You froze my brain?" Shadow said turning accusingly at Sita.

"Geez no, it's just an expression for the roof of your mouth getting too cold." Sita said flatly explaining this. She could not imagine how someone his age didn't know what a brain freeze was. Though her logic then dictated that it was the same kind of person that had never tried ice cream in their life. She sighed.

"You knew this would happen." Shadow said accusingly.

"I mean technically yeah, I know that it exists. I thought you were going to eat more daintily than you did…" Sita said sighing, "I should have remembered and warned you." She rolled her eyes as she said so.

"You should have." Shadow said

"I'll tell you what…" Sita said looking at her watch again while collecting the trash at the table, "To make it up to you I'll invite you over to our house for homemade pizza this Friday. I make it homemade on a Friday once a month." Sita pulled over a napkin and handed it to Perfume.

"She's practicing her handwriting. She'll write you the address." Perfume carefully wrote the address on it and handed it over to Shadow. "Come over around 1 o'clock and I'll make you whatever kind of pizza you want."

Shadow took the napkin and eyed it. He was curious what the pizza would taste like, the female said the ice cream would be good and it was. Perhaps he should trust that her pizza would be good too. He wondered briefly though if her cooking would be like Rouge's. If all women cooked like Rouge he would rather never eat again.

Shadow only nodded, "Perhaps I will make time."

"You gotta clear out your busy social schedule huh?" Sita said sarcastically as she wiped Perfume's face off.

"Of course." Shadow answered, causing Sita to roll her eyes.

"I'll suppose I'll see you then." She said waving, "I'll see you later, have a nice day Shadow." And left the restaurant. Shadow looked at the napkin with some disdain. He supposed he should trust the female. At the very least, the food was an amusement.

And only the food.


End file.
